Day-Maker #11

To break up some of the heavy stuff...

About 60 seconds after Percy and I parted ways at midnight last night, he called me, asking if I like doughnuts. Two minutes later, he showed up on my doorstep with doughnuts tied to strings, apparently part of his payment for a juggling gig. Also, part of my breakfast this morning.

Part I

I have a lot of catching up to do on here, and we'll see how it goes. I like to do things in chronological order, so that means it'll take a few posts before I catch up to the present for occasions such as the Colbert/Stewart rally and Halloween. However, the things on my mind that will come out are not exactly cheery topics.

A couple weeks ago, a student at the College took her own life. It is a tragedy that shook the College. As John Donne wrote,

No man is an island,

Entire of itself.
Each is a piece of the continent,

A part of the main....

Each man's death diminishes me,

For I am involved in mankind.

It is even more true that we are a part of each other, when, as I recently wrote, the College has such a strong community. We are united as more than humanity; we are united as the College.

I want to go two places with this, so please indulge me in two less-than-happy posts.

I first found out about the tragedy from a friends G-Chat status, reading, "Take care of one another, Tribe," followed by a link to the article in the local newspaper. In subsequent discussions, the idea came up that we as a society have forgotten how to take care of each other.

I run some mornings, and a few days ago as I was running I saw a plastic bag blowing across a yard. I thought about picking it up, decided that I didn't want to run across a neighbor's (wet) grass, and went on. For a few more steps. Then I changed my mind. I decided that I wanted to be That Girl, and I often am not. I wanted to be That Girl who picks up plastic bags blowing across yards. Who smiles at strangers. Who makes overworked cashiers laugh, or at least breath a little more easily. Who sees the beauty in others and speaks it to their faces. And thinking about being That Girl does not make me her. It makes me someone who thinks about being her.

How many people go through life considering being That Girl or That Guy? Seeing people who maybe could use one extra smile, one extra hug, one extra kind word... and don't want to step on a neighbor's lawn. And yet, the prospect of making the world a better place should motivate us to take that extra step. After all, we all do have a responsibility for each other. This idea is obscured by our society's views of independence and, I think, promoted by our over-commitment to tolerance, which too often translates into "leave other people alone."

When we "leave other people alone," however, we... well, we do just that. When we remove ourselves from other people's lives and problems, we step back from where they need us most. Of course, not everyone needs every other person poking his or her nose everywhere. However, we all need shoulders on which to lean, ears which will listen, hearts onto which we can unburden ourselves. After all, who wants to be left alone to face the world? I, for one, could not take it on alone.

In the wake of the recent suicide, I have heard a lot of talk about how we need to take care of each other. The first step is to realize that we can't just "leave other people alone." We need others. Life without people who care, both best friends and random strangers, is empty.

Final note: I want to echo the words of Monsignor, who said Mass the Sunday after. He emphasized that if you are feeling trapped, lost, backed into a corner, do not give up. Do not despair. There is always, always someone there for you. If that means calling me at any moment, do not hesitate. If that means being in touch with someone better able to help you than I, do not hesitate. Here is a place to start: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ (1-800-273-TALK (8255)).

Day-Maker #10

The speed limit on I-295 around Richmond is now 70mph. I can go fast.

Day-Maker #9

The Hospitality (read: large meals and parties) Board Member and I went to Trader Joe's to pick out pumpkins for the Halloween party. Picture two small girls moving digging around in large boxes of pumpkins, searching for 8 of the perfect shape and size. We found them.

Day-Maker #8

Sitting at the coffee shop on campus with two men in Roman collars.

Brick Fail

Getting Mondays off is conducive to cleaning house and running errands; not so much to a social life. Except that Percy teaches night classes, so having Mondays off is conducive to late morning and early afternoon adventures with him.

Earlier in the year, we discovered that the brickyard in CW has helpers : tourists who decide that a part of their ideal vacation includes stomping around in mud. I'm not sure that would be part of my ideal vacation, but it certainly makes the 'burg a cooler place to live. Percy and I decided to spend a Monday churning clay into mud with our bare feet for the purpose of creating bricks.

On our first foray into brickland, the nice lady in the hoop skirt and bonnet told us that they had just fired up the kiln, and it was too hot for anyone to go near the brickyard. She advised us to come back after September 20th. (I have discovered that the nice people who work there are very good at telling people to come back for things.) So this past Monday, Percy and I came back.

When we walked into the brickyard, I saw the two pits that were obviously used for mud stomping. And these two pits were obviously dry. As the friendly brickmaker told the crowd (which consisted of two families with small children, plus the pair of us) they were done with the brickmaking until the summer. Now they just had a stack of bricks waiting to fire.

So Percy and I learned about bricks and brickmaking and the bricks that the friendly brickmaker is making for Mr. Jefferson's school up the road. And planned our next trip to the brickmakers -- next summer. Unless I decide to go back for the firing of the kiln on December 8.

Alma Mater Hail

When Julia, Wendy, and I were freshmen, we took the bus to Target on homecoming weekend. As we came back, we saw the crowds of alumni of various ages spreading from the Alumni House and stadium into the wider world of campus. Ever since that day, I have looked forward to the day when Wendy and Julia and I would reunite at Homecoming.

I never expected that, for my first Homecoming, both Julia and I would be living here. Unfortunately, Wendy could not make it down, so I have to wait at least another year for visions to come true.

Homecoming #1 went down with no Wendy, but I did manage to have an amazing time. I had Benjamin and Annie (no, loyal readers, you have not met her yet; but she will reappear) under my roof, so I had no lack of good friends... not even counting the people, such as one of my favorite apartmentmates, with whom I spent several wonderful hours on Saturday.

Friday night I devoted to friends from freshmen year; Saturday I spent more with CCM alumni. I think that since I live here, I had a different experience of Homecoming. Lots of awesome people were coming home to me, but I wasn't going anywhere. My normal social lines were suddenly redrawn and my spheres redivided.

And then Sunday, the people whom I knew and loved and wanted more time with started to trickle out, until dark and early Monday morning, I drove Benjamin to the airport and my normal life began again.